Not a very pleasent conversation

I wonder if Benjamin heard us talking about death lately (see post bellow, Derek's brother passed last Friday) because today early in the morning he turned to me and asked:


B: So mom - how old you have to be before you can die?

Me still kinda of like “what?” just said: Well like when we are 90 years old sounds like a good age to me!

B: How about 97?

M: 97 Sounds even better to me!

B: Mammy – who will take care of us if you and daddy die?

This really made me uncomfortable because Dan & I had being talking about that for the past 2 weeks (never in front of him anyways) so I started wondering very paranoid “OMG where did he get that? Is it really gonna happen?”
I answered: Uncle Mike and Tia Claudia can take care of you and there's always Vovo Fatima if you want to be with her.
Well before I said anything else – and the next thing I was gonna ask as “why are you asking?” he answered my question:

“Daddy will be the first one to die”

trying not to sound panicky or something like that I asked: Really? Why do you say that?

And his very simple and full of sense answer came:

“Because remember how your dad die before your mom? So this is how is supposed to be and dad was born before you so he will die earlier!”and out of blue he popped a request

“Can I watch the video of me being born? Like now?”

OK! I was like very impressed with this conversation, it just happened as I was here reading my e-mails and catching up with the bills. I didn't play his birth video – I just kinda of changed the subject because I think I'm done talking about life and death for the rest of the day!
I guess he talked about it because Dan & I being talking a lot about what will happen to he kids or let me re-phrase it – what we want for it to happen to the kids in case we are both gone and then you listen something this strong from your 4 year old! A little too much for me lol

I must work on a will fast so I can rest in peace – not meaning die, just sleeping at night! =oP

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Just my personal opinion on Sympathy Gifts

My brother in law's younger brother passed away – and I want to send them something. This got me thinking of traditions and different things that you do in different countries!


Well – what I really want to do is get on a plane – go there and be at their service for whatever they may need! Watch the children, cook, clean! So they don't have to worry about anything! Make them company... Bet here with them.

I'm not sure that this is what they want – but sure it is what I would like for people to do for me!

When dad died this past May I got a ton of cards on the mail, with the most wonderful words... I received a ton of food, and that was nice, very nice except I had all this food in the first 2 or 3 days (some of it that we are not even used to eating) and so much went for waist cause we just couldn't eat it all within the first 5 days and then, when I was so depressed in the week to come I had to cook and take care of things.

We got several weird trays – fruit tray and nuts, and dry fruits... got flowers that died very fast. And this got me thinking is that what I want to send to them?

There this one orchid I got the day dad died and it bloomed for almost the whole summer. Not it's there, with no flowers but I know it will come back – and I remember how beautiful it was and how beautiful it is. Yes – every time I look at it I think about how I got it because of dad's passing but it doesn't bring me sadness. It makes me think of all the wonderful memories I have with him, and how beautiful the flowers were and the next thing I think of it is that sooner or later it will bloom again and so now I have something to look forward. IT brings hope and goodness into a “not so good” memory.

I really don't want to sound ungrateful – the fact people were thinking of me in this hard time is so nice and no words can express how thankful I'm. I'm sure people feel different and some people want to be alone and all but for me; I was already feeling alone, now I lost my dad... I can't even call him. Last thing I want is to be alone! I want company – I want people to hang out with... feel me up with good energy and laugh! Yes – we'll cry sometimes and it's nice to have someone to cry with. But when you loose something – in my mind you want to buy a new one. Dad can't ever be replaced but I sure want to feel like I enjoyed every minute I could of my family and friends before I go or someone else goes. Life is short; passes by so fast and we don't even notice until it's gone. And the time we spend with each other and the love we can give to each other ~ that is just priceless!


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LOL - now...

I guess these kind of stuff only happens with me! (Yeah - I got a large list of those situations - and for starters this is an extra mild little one.


I sure think that my brain has some sort of damage that the Drs. can't quite see it I guess - maybe it all happened when I felt out of a bull back in collage (Yes - I did try to ride a bull when I was in Vet school)

I don't believe this situation can ever be described as funny as it was in real life! I mean - if I say too many details you loose the point and if I don't describe it you won't get it! So I will try my best to describe it - not sure how the "funny" of it will as you read it but man - it sure cracked me up to tear my eyes and send all sadness and downs away!!

So this is the picture - I got to go potty so bad, we left our meeting and was about 7pm, we were all starving so we headed out to Bob Evans for dinner, Dan parked and said "Run inside and go pee - I'm gonna keep the kids in the car smoke a cigarette outside, then I will take the kids and we meet inside"

Without thinking twice I ran inside - passed the hostess into the back of the hallway where the restrooms where - I looked at the signs - girls on the left, boys on the right into the right I go... close the door and started on my business. *Deep breath* I can think again, my bladder was just exploding until then!

So I'm just standing there and I see my body is turned BACK to the toilet. I hear this strong noise of someone going pee - I look over to the left and see the feet "next door" facing the toilet. I mean like the person next door is facing the toilet ...



HOLD ON!





I hear a pee...


HOLD ON!...


it's like strong and non stopping!

OMG - there is a hermaphrodite in the stall next to me!


WOW



WOW


or - OMG could I? Am I in the wrong bathroom?


Hold on! No WAY!


I TOTALLY looked in the sign! I'm SURE I got in the right side!

SO I got out of there - not sure if I should even wash my hands or just run out of there!

So I did - I washed my hands as fast as I could looking at the stall next to me praying he or she or she or he - whatever was in there wouldn't come out before I was done!

If I was in the girls and that was a he/she I didn't want to see his/her face! If I was in the boys bathroom I wanted out of there ASAP!

So I washed - washed my hands as fast as I could - breathing heavy and got out of there!

MEN!

that is what the sign said - I was in the men's bathroom!!!

(((deep breath))) here again! for many reasons this time...

* empty bladder
* no hermaphrodite LOL
* out of men's bathroom before anyone saw me (except the hostess) LOL


So - yeah! I did go in the wrong bathroom! Things that ONLY HAPPEN TO ME! =oP